The Start, and Thinking She's Soft

Soft!

Last night, while lying in bed (resting!), I told Ariane that I was thinking of starting a blog about her.  Obviously she asked what I meant, and I told her that I wanted to write a daily log or note that just contained my thoughts on her for the day; what I remember about her that day.  I told her that the way I thought of her today (yesterday) was basically that:

she was soft ... meaning her skin, her touch. 

She basically said "Hmm ..."

That's ok.  I honestly don't think that anything online is really for her.  It's not that I want to write down all my thoughts and give them to her and say "read all this", but I just want to make sure that I think about the way that I feel about her.  I also want to be able to go back in time and see what was going on back then in my head, whenever that may be.

Prior to lying in bed just resting last night, Ariane and I were arguing about money.  MONEY.  Yes, the one thing that I would never want to argue about.  I fear that this spells the end of our relationship -- as with every argument -- because I've read many stories online about couples fighting about money and separating.  Not because they weren't right for each other, but because they're broke!  She said at dinner that she wasn't happy with her life "down here", which usually means "Broomfield" to her.  After feeling bad about hearing her say that, I asked her what she meant by that.  She explained that she feels like she works too much and doesn't spend enough time with me.  I feel the same!  But of course we work because we need the money.  After discussing her car purchase, and my superhero costume purchases, and my student loan, and work work work, we were feeling kind of depressed.  Of course, after talking through it all, we got over it.  It just sucks not having much money even when you should have a bunch of cash!

Back to her being soft.  In my mind, when I think of her being soft, it's the same as her being sweet.  It's the same as me thinking that she's the only person in the world.  It's the same as me thinking about how much I love her.  It comes through as me thinking that she's soft.  That should help explain the next paragraph:

After going to sleep last night, I woke up suddenly around two or three a.m. thinking there was someone in the house, as usual when I wake up in the middle of the night.  After deciding I didn't have to protect Little from anything, I rolled over and spooned her.  As I put my arm over her, I felt her hip, then her arm, and finally rest my hand on her stomach.  I remember thinking 'she's really soft ...' as I drifted off to sleep.